the world vs. me, me vs. me

it seems people don't like who i am anymore, who I've become.

to be honest neither do i.

it seems I've changed noticeably.
i hear it at home.

i hear it at work.

i dont want to be how i am, im not happy it seems.

i dont know why exactly im not happy

it may be that i miss how everything was. everything was new, i didnt have to be serious about my life.

now i do, i have to work to pay this and that. it kind of sucks.

not that im lazy, although i am mostly, im just not feeling like im going to go anywhere in this life. i dont think ill be happy stuck at one profession, one job, one career.

i love to try new things.

i want to run my own business.
i want my own restaurant.

i want to go out at night and just have fun, not worry what anyone thinks or if ill be too tired at work.

i want to take trips.

how can you say you dont like what ive become, when i never knew who i was.


>the BE

today we adopted a cat from the humane society. his name is midnight. hes 1 year old and was a stray.

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someday

we all make mistakes. some worse than others. as my previous blog is talking about pain. i nearly ruined my amazing relationship with my girlfriend. now rebuilding that and the trust that was lost. im in pain and so is she. but i love her. i love her with all my heart. things havent been how they were when our love started.. but im certain that our pain now will inevitably better our relationship as long as we stay faithful. as long as we remember the good and strive to bring it back. 3 years weve been together. i love her. and there will be many more years..

pain. pain is hurting someone

pain. pain is hurting someone you love. pain is being helpless. i found pain. i did it to myself.

someday im going to just

someday im going to just run away. someday everything will be alright. someday.

i missed this girl

what the shit has been going on...

Well.

Last weekend, me and Leo went to a Chiodos show.. it was pretty amazing. Leo pretty much just went for Scary Kids. Man it was good.

I was also sick last week. that sucked. although, i kinda like being sick.. i get to lay around all day.

anyway.... thats about it..

tomorrow is friday..